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What if ... What NOW?


There have been many times in my past 20 years, and maybe longer that I have thought about, "What if".  I've asked myself numerous times "What if I had spoken to him?", "What if I told him how I felt?", "What if I made this decision, instead of that one?".  Regardless of how many times I asked myself these types of questions, the outcome has always been the same.  I'm here now.  I can't go back and change it.

With the introduction of social media, many of us reconnect with people who have almost completely vanished from our lives.  I hear numerous stories how people find old friends, old loves, make new friends and leave current loves.  It never fails to amaze me how one can walk away from the now to revisit the past, thus bringing it forward into the present.  They fix regrets, say what they have to say, do what they meant to do and attempt to leave all past hurts behind.  Does it fix it?  

I'm not sure if anything is ever fixed by revisiting the past.  What I am sure of is the amount of closure one can get by reconnecting and the prospect to say what they wished they had said, or wanted to say years ago.  I guess sometimes going back, saying what you meant to say, and doing what you meant to do can have positive results.  How many times have the results been negative?  And why can't we just be happy in our present state of being... the NOW?

What if I had worked out all those years?  What if I had traveled more?  What if I had gotten my education?  What if I had children?  What if I told him/her I loved them?  What if I took the job?  What if I just did what was in my heart to do?  What if I hadn't taken that last drink?  What if I said NO instead of saying Yes?

What if?

What we did or didn’t do that changed the course of our lives then, is what we can still and will do to benefit our lives now.  So, what now?  You didn’t then, but you still can move forward.  Are you going to sit and ponder "what if" for the rest of your life?  What now?  Will you stop looking back?  If you're living and breathing, does this mean you still have time.  Maybe you can say what is in your heart to say, do what is in your mind to do... live the life you've always wanted.  Maybe not.  Maybe it won't be so simple.  Maybe that opportunity never introduces itself.  Do you simply stop being?  Stop moving forward?  Live an unhappy or miserable existence because of it?   No.

"What if" can have astronomical amounts of power over you and your happiness if you allow it.   It can even paralyze you, stop you from seeing the present and the future, and can exasperate as time goes on.

Don't be paralyzed by the "What if"s.  Use those to motivate you into the "What now"s.  


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