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MAMA Gone WILD!

I'm not sure if men PERSONALLY experience these episodes, but most certain they've witnessed them at some point in there life.  Sometimes life seems unbearable... but with a little help we all get through it!  This was written to let mothers, young and like me know... it's ok ... we all go through it!

MAMA Gone WILD

I'm sure we've all heard about the videos; MTV type Spring break beach parties where young girls go around, scantly clad doing the most unimaginable things.  We'll don't worry, I'm not going there with this (sorry men)... well... maybe not in the same context... or content...

Just think about it...

Can you imagine getting caught on video in a not so flattering moment?  A moment created in sheer desperation to get the attention of your children?  I mean, "to get attention"... that's usually why most people unfailingly do the maniacal things they do... right?  I mean, this attention getting juncture goes way beyond "the look".  You know... we've all seen it... "the look" mother's give right before they explode, come unraveled.

"The LOOK...", it's the demented face a mother gets right before her bubble bursts - no that's commonplace mama behavior... A mama gone wild is way, way more intense, more fanatical.  It's the moment AFTER "the look", the unrecognizable, scrunched up, out of form, eye bulging face you get when you have reached limitations beyond infinity.  It's the moment AFTER "the look"...

"Mama Gone WILD" is the exact moment when your jaws begin to ache and your teeth are moments from being ground into dust from the sheer force of your tightly clenched jaws!  This "MAMA GONE WILD" moment has the potential of permanently adding two NEW deep lined wrinkles across your forehead... a furrow above all furrows!  As you try to relax your face, the sheer tension of it all has "the look" locked in place.  It would take two weeks of enduring facials to gain relief... YES... you're getting it... you know "the MAMA Gone Wild look".

OH... and lest not forget to mention your bulging eyeballs... will they ever go back to their original position?

Now your temples begin pulsing and you've got the worst headache EVER!  Worse ... you have brain freeze... the coldest of cold beverages could NEVER bring brain freeze like this!  YEAH... Now you've got your children's attention!!!  That's "THE MAMA Gone Wild LOOK"....

You try to open your mouth to speak... as everyone sits staring at you.  They're now TOO afraid to look away.  They gaze upon you intently... as if waiting for some volcanic eruption to momentarily occur.  Your mouth opens and what comes out sounds more like YOUR MOTHER... a boorish, fierce, voice straining from your tight throat, spewing with a force sounding more like the ear piercing squeal of a hawg... right before slaughter...

It's then... MAMA GONE WILD... you realize how you're acting... You get a mental picture of yourself... and as you look upon your children you see fear... over whelming, heart wrenching fear in their eyes.  For some insane reason, a giggle escapes you... maybe it's the mental picture of how you must be looking right about now... or maybe it's the intense faces gazing upon you....  It happens, a giggle escapes... Out of nowhere, a giggle.. a soft, almost inaudible giggle...

Your boiling point begins to simmer down, and you break out into freakish hysterical laughter; no obvious reason for this uncontrollable urge to LAUGH.  An outburst of sheer release escapes you...  Your children's fearful stares turn into bewildered glances... they worriedly look at you... and again at one another.  What's even more humorous than YOUR preceding behavior are the apprehensive, dumbfounded expressions you get from your children as they try to connect the dots.  You laugh even harder; you're thinking "can't beat 'em, join 'em".  This outburst of laughter has caused tears to roll down your cheeks.  Laughing so hard, your sides ache, you bend forward and wrap your arms around your middle.

INSTANTLY, you've gone from cackling like a mad woman to crying like an inconsolable baby.  IT'S AT THIS VERY MOMENT, you realize you just put on the biggest and most outrageous academy award winning emotional display... EVER.  It's way better than anything Jodi Foster could ever surmise.  I'm talking OSCAR... Golden Globe...

Thank GOD no one had their cell phones, videos or cameras in the room and caught it all on film!  To say the least... AND LORD knows you don't want it showing up on Fox News, or CNN... ""Mother Gone Wild" in a desperate attempt to get her children's undivided attention."  A performance with a standing ovation...  A performance so amazing you could get 100,000 hits on YOUTUBE instantly...

SHEW... Thank goodness THAT didn't happen; You'd be demonized, raked over the coal, and dubbed as the worst mama EVER!  Even though you'd be expressing the same hormonal, stress riddled, tormented reaction 1 million other mothers experience...!  YOU would FOREVER be dubbed as "MAMA Gone Wild".

Don't despair ... "Mama Gone Wild"... it's normal behavior... Go ahead and lay across your bed... cry it out.  Your children will soon come to your room to comfort and check on you!  It will be then...AT that PARTICULAR and distinct moment... you realize being a mother... EVEN on your "MAMA Gone Wild" days is the BEST!!  NO job, entitlement, placement, status, or anything you could endure will EVER replace the LOVE and emotion you experience from being a MOTHER.   NO amount of money could purchase that "MAMA Gone Wild" experience.... down to the final... quiet...ever so subtle "It's ok mama, I love you..." you receive from your child at the very end of your VERY natural, albeit extravagant... humanistic performance.

God bless...






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